Depression 

The lonliest place to be, is in a place you can not describe. A place where there is no light, no thoughts, no emotion. A place that you know inside out and back to front, and yet you can not draw a map to show others. It’s lifeless here and no matter how many seeds I plant, nothing grows. Yet by the day, I can feel my surroundings shrivelling away, making a nothingness even less. I know this place, yet I still can not find the words to tell others, or to even tell myself out loud. Because for some reason, the words in my head do not translate to any from the English language. I guess this place I am in, could be described as an isolated prison. One from which I can see colour, life, movement, yet I can not reach it for the walls around me are too thick. And from the outside, these walls that cage me can not be seen, as the human eye can not see past a smile. There is not much here, no sadness, no joy, no anger, no hope, no trust. There is simply a vast darkness of echoing noises, which are so familiar they become lost in the silence. I don’t feel distressed, for I know this place. I do not feel desperation, as I have made peace with my surroundings. I do not feel, for my mind has long gone, replaced with this prison I’m in. I continue, as I still remember the motions- but as for meaning in actions, there is none. You do not see where I am trapped, for a smile becomes an invisibility cloak, though I wish I could do the impossible: tell you, show you, let you in. It’s lonely here, a loneliness you can’t understand. There is no exit, no end. This is forever and you will never truly know.